Of building blocks and baby dolls

Recently I finished reading Pink Brain Blue Brain by Lise Eliot.  Eliot says she originally set out to explain the neurological basis of the well-documented differences between boys and girls, men and women.  As she examined the research, however, she found that most of the differences that exist are not, in fact, biologically based.  Rather, there are some small differences at birth and those slight differences are widened into ever-growing gaps as a result of socialization. 

The most important take home from this book was that brain differences are very often not genetic differences.  Our brains are shaped by our experiences so when boys are encouraged to be active and discouraged from sharing their feelings their brains develop in a different way than girls who are steeped in a world of words and relationships.  As Eliot so rightly points out, recognizing the ways in which these well publicized sex differences develop empowers us to change how we raise our kids in order to maximize their potential in all directions.  

Spider Mae in her party dress

So girls could benefit from more physical play, especially things that involve throwing, kicking and aiming.  These activities help to develop visuo-spatial skills – a key ingredient in fields such as math, physics and engineering – as well as their gross-motor skills. 

Boys, on the other hand, need more opportunities to engage in nurturing play, and more emphasis on recreational reading.  To name but two of Eliot’s suggestions.

What it comes down to is this: All children need to be provided exposure to, and opportunities to engage in, the full spectrum of play and learning, regardless of sex or assigned gender.  Building blocks and baby dolls, story books and soccer balls.  You’ll never know what your kid is capable of if you don’t give them the chance to explore it all, gender be damned.

[For a more detailed summary of her book watch this video of Lise Eliot presenting her findings]